Moments back at home

Okie.. so its been some time since I actually wrote something. Reasons???

1. Am not frustrated or irritated and so there is no much disturbing thoughts wandering around inside my head ;-)
2. Am feeling a little distant with things as my mom's not keeping well.

The first one ofcourse is a good sign for my head and brains but not for my blogging routine :D May be its just time to move ahead and think out of the box, so that I can actually write about things that makes sense rather than random thoughts from inside of my head. Anyways, the new start will anyways have to wait for some more time till I can take an easy breath.

As for my mom’s health, she’s fine now except for the little tiredness. And till the time she wakes up with all energy, I own this whole house of ours and believe me it’s really a big deal to manage the household. Something that I had pushed aside from my memories with the recent stays in PG’s and right now am trying to refresh all my memories of cooking and not just that; its even difficult for me to recollect now as to which cupboard has got the bed covers and which one’s got my bro’s clothes. It’s all the more embarrassing to mention about the storeroom details and kitchen cabinets!! Anyways the time now is good except for the feeling of missing that creeps in for those days when I shared a real small home out there in B’lore.

I am just wondering if it’s the age of my mother or just that days are moving into those difficult times which we all fear about. Unmanageable is not just the word! 50’s is not quite an age at this time of the century and so it has to be the constant illness of her physical body that is taking her back to the childhood behavior. She can be happy in everything that is happening around and at the same time worry about the next forthcoming incident. She can talk for hours together and feel happiness and also be sad at things that just don’t affect her in anyways.

And for all the time that I spend with her she makes me wonder if I have grown up a little too much for I have no time or space inside this heart or mind to bother about anyone except me and the real close ones ofcourse. I have absolutely no topics to chatter about and if not for the alert on food and medicines its silence that reigns between us but if only she manages to rest her mouth. So where do I stand in terms like empathy, social being etc. My social life sucks and am not a person who have too many friends and even for the real close ones, am real bad in probing into their thoughts unless they decide to share it. So as a social animal am just wondering if it is my mom, who’s confined to the four walls of the house that’s much better than me, though I boast about thet chance to meet people and talk to them and understand and grow.

I was busy in the kitchen when I heard the sounds of those young ones in our lane playing on the road. And for a moment I remembered my brother’s younger days when he ran around the road playing with his ball. The small boy who hung around me in his shorts have grown up to a man now and is ready to hold me when am failing.

Too many memories passing inside my head and so this is just a random post where am trying to put them all in. :D Getting back to the house which's seen me transform from a small little girl to a sister, to a daughter and to a wife and I guess, spending some ample time in here, not just on a weekend visit, is bringing up all those memories from the past, which has actually made up the ME of today.

Look forward for some beautiful memories from the past! :D