How should it be - Wide Open or Half - Shut?

"Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, and half-shut afterwards." - Benjamin Franklin

Extra Marital Relationships - a phrase that has gained lot of light in the recent past. Is there anything that you can judge about it? Is it right or Is it wrong???

I myself had sometime back written about my take on how it is absolutely fine to move ahead or rather, out of a relationship, if you feel at any point that it is injustice to cling on anymore. At times it really surprises me to know that there are a lot of women/men out there who are ready to carry on with the pain in their hearts, knowing well that even though they might end up sharing the bed they no longer share the heart of the better other half. The word Divorce is dreaded for the commotion it creates in the family. And at times the only reason for the wedlock to continue is sheer ignorance - ignorance that the other half is sharing an other relationship also.

I don’t want to look at the morality of this concept here, as there are many whom I have come across,  keeping it up with this quarter-game in life. And worst is that many a times the reason they give appear to be completely valid.

* When am completely in love with my other half, why should it be a wrong thing for me to take some time for myself and share a little time with someone who match with my thoughts.

* Am taking care of my better half and kid.. I do everything for them and share all that I have with my family around. Then what reason do they have to tell me I shouldn’t indulge in something that kind of relaxes me? When am with 'her' I don’t have to worry about the bills I have to pay or the contracts I have to close. I talk about my dreams and she cares about it. Then why not???

* Loneliness - simple.

* The need to feel needed by someone... to know that out there is that one person who would like to see you the next day.

The only conclusion I could manage is that it is loneliness that force people to side-line the vows. And at times, they could be so doomed that even while sharing a fulfilling meal with the whole family around, they still feel completely alone. Thoughts sometimes don’t match and dreams don’t harmonize well around that table.

Marriage as they say will either make you a philospher or a complete, happy person. Its always easier to hop, ignoring the fact that you could be let down any moment. But then, why is it so difficult to try and put some of what they call as "effort" and nourish the relationship that you are bound to share this lifetime. Why not talk, teach, learn and improve. I know its easier said than done specially 'cos of the 3 letter word we all share in common - - EGO.

After having read so many of Mills&Boons', I guess, its just normal for me to think, hope and beleive in beautiful marriages; to look at the brighter side of it.

Though not quite sure about how to conclude this topic that I brought up, I would surely like to get a few insights from you on this.

* What in your opinion is the best nourishment for a relationship?

* What do you think is the reason for anyone to go astray?

* Have you ever come across a situation when you felt - that the reason is... oopss a valid one, ofcourse.